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28.06.08: Lack Of Blogging, Holidays, Australians, Americans, Break Ins, Manipulation and Gossip

Streaming Song Of The Day: Joyride by Roxette

Free MP3 Of The Day: Infinite Circle by James Blackshaw

So, I haven't blogged for a couple of days because I have been attending my grandfather's funeral.  A slightly upsetting time for me, but I am gradually getting over it now.  Hopefully throwing myself into my work and my blogging will help me get over it.  This said, it isn't helping much that my parents are constantly arguing over small, stupid things like what features our new bathroom is going to have. 

Last night was a night from hell.  One saving grace is that I have most of next week off.  Queen Chav has screwed up my holidays and given me 3 days off instead of 2, and also given me my 2 regular days off, giving me 5 days off in total.  Not quite sure what I am going to blog about next week as I don't really want to take almost a week off from blogging.  I do have a few ideas with what to fill this blog with, but I will go into that as time goes on.

So, first up The Blonde Bombshell insisted on checking up on everything I did.  I chose to work the soft drinks, and when I told him that I had finished working them, he immediately went into the loading bay and scoured every single cage there, and found 3 or 4 cases of drinks that I had missed.  I just let him get on with it and continued working everything else.  But then I got another slap in the face after he worked the pet food and was told that I should have worked it because I had worked the racking. 

Then I had to deal with a couple of moronic Australians.  First, one of them came up to me and said "Excuse me, do you have a bread aisle?" and I told him we did.  He then asked me if it had bread in it.  I ignored him and showed him where it was.  Then his friend asked me if we had cheese.  So I showed him where it was, and had to deal with him squealing "I can't see it, I can't see it!"  So I showed him it was right in front of his eyes, and considered getting the hammer from the loading bay.  And then I heard "Do you have grated cheese?  Oh, no, you don't."  So I pointed at the bags of grated cheese.  And then they came up to the counter, squealing and comparing their shopping trip to Supermarket Sweep because one of their boxes of eggs was missing an egg, so one of them asked where the eggs were.  At this point I was getting really annoyed with them so I told them they were underneath the big sign that said eggs. 

We also had some Americans in.  Now, I actually like serving Americans because they are normally very polite and great to serve.  The ones I served last night were no exception.  They were amazed that we sold Marlboro lights in smaller packs than 20s, and they were really surprised that I gave them a choice over which size of matches they could buy.  And bless them, they must have just missed the sign which said "Lymington" outside the store when they asked me how to get to Lymington. 

Plus we had excitement!  A group of drunks somehow managed to get up onto the railway, and we have a disused station above our store.  It's disused because people used to leap off it into the path of incoming trains to kill themselves.  So the people who owned the station spent millions securing it, making sure that no-one can get to it from our side.  Big spikey security fences, barbed wire, and the most high tech of all - fast growing plants which now cover the entrance.  So, we heard them kick the wooden gate open, then crashing through the plants, and then stopping.  I really thought they were going to try and climb over the fence, which made me burst into song.  I grinned and sung to myself "Someone call the ambulence, there's gonna be an accident!" from Infra Red by Placebo.  Slaphead asked me what I said, so I sung it at him which made him laugh. 

But the real kicker of the night was The Blonde Bombshell telling me that I couldn't have my break.  This was after he called me and my family monkeys.  And called me stupid and told me that I can't think.  So I stood up to him, he thinks he's the alpha male of the store simply because Pedro told him he's supervisor.  Unfortunately he learnt that it takes more than just someone telling someone else that they are in charge to lead people.  You see, I play a very subtle game.  I study mentalism, psychology and persuasion, have done for getting on for ten years now, and I know how to influence people.  I don't use it very often because as I said, I play things subtly.  Slaphead asked if I was having my break and I told him I wasn't allowed to, that The Bombshell said we could have our breaks when we finished the ambient.  He stormed over to The Bombshell and told him I was going on my break and that he would take over what I was doing, and then he was going on his break and then simply walked away from him and told me to go on my break. 

Anyway, tonight I am working with Miss C, which should be good as we have a lot of Big Brother gossip to...well...gossip about!  I'll let her serve the customers and I'll just work all the stock in my whirlwind manner.  Then we can get the store faced up in double quick time, and then we can stand around and gossip until our heart's content. 
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